Greatest Funniest Movie Moments and Scenes

Part 5

Greatest and Funniest Movie Scenes
Film Title/Year and Brief Funniest Scenes Description

The Cocoanuts (1929)

The numerous puns (Groucho: "Oh, you want some [ice water]. Get some onions, that'll make your eyes (ice) water" and "On this site we're going to build an Eye and Ear Hospital. This is going to be a sight for sore eyes") and one-liners ("Believe me, you gotta get up early if you want to get out of bed"); also the scene of leering Florida hotel manager Mr. Hammer's (Groucho Marx) first courting of Mrs. Potter (Margaret Dumont) -("I'll meet you tonight under the moon. Oh, I can see you now—you and the moon. You wear a neck-tie so I'll know you" and "Your eyes, your eyes, they shine like the pants of a blue serge suit. That's not a reflection on you—it's on the pants"); the scene of the rigged auction: ("I’ll wrestle any man here for five dollars!"); the famous 'ice water' routine: ("Oh, you want some ice water? Well, get an onion, that'll make your eyes water"); the non-sequitur reenactment of Willard's famous "Spirit Of 76" painting in the hotel lobby, the 'swapping bedrooms' scene between two connecting hotel rooms, and the famous tongue-twisting, precisely-timed "Viaduct"/"Why a Duck?" routine between con-man Hammer and guest Chico

Coming to America (1988)

The scene of wealthy, sweet-natured African Prince Akeem's (Eddie Murphy) bath, when a Nubian bathing attendant (Victoria Dillard) declares after emerging from under the water: "The royal penis is clean, your Highness"; also the famous barbershop scene, in which five characters (two played by Eddie Murphy (including an elderly white Jewish man) and two played by Arsenio Hall) argue about the best boxer in history (Clarence: "There they go, every time I start talkin 'bout boxing, a white man got to pull Rocky Marciano out their ass. That's their one, that's their one. Rocky Marciano. Rocky Marciano. Let me tell you something once and for all. Rocky Marciano was good, but compared to Joe Louis, Rocky Marciano ain't s--t"); and the scene of Akeem in a bar interviewing NYC candidates for his bride-to-be ("I'm not interested in a man unless he drives a BMW" and "I'm almost single. My husband's on death-row" and "I'm into the group thing" and "I want to tear you apart, and your friend too", etc.)

The Court Jester (1956)

The infamous rhyming wordplay by impersonating medieval court jester Hawkins (Danny Kaye) about remembering the cup location for a pre-joust toast with a drink that is poisoned: ("The pellet with the poison is in the vessel with the pestle. The chalice from the palace has the brew that is true") and then the change in directions, with hilarious results: ("They broke the chalice from the palace and replaced it with a flagon..." - "Did you put the pellet with the poison in the vessel with the pestle?" - "No, the pellet with the poison's in the flagon with the dragon. The vessel with the pestle has the brew that is true"); and the spell cast on the jester by court witch Griselda (Mildred Natwick) that can hilariously be undone - and reinstated - by just a snap of the fingers

A Day at the Races (1937)

The classic "Tootsie-Frootsie" ice cream/code book scene in which vendor and racetrack tipster Tony (Chico Marx) sells a racing tips book to gullible horse doctor and sanitarium head Dr. Hugo Z. Hackenbush (Groucho Marx); also the scene in which Hackenbush plays half-deaf "Colonel Hawkins" of the Florida Medical Board to infuriate Whitmore (Leonard Ceeley); the two absurd medical examination scenes ("Just put the gown on, not the nurse") - first with Stuffy (Harpo Marx) and then with Mrs. Upjohn (Margaret Dumont); the famous one-liners: "Either he's dead or my watch has stopped!" and "If I hold you any closer, I'll be in back of ya"; the climactic Big Race, and the film's highlight - in which villainess Miss Nora "Flo" (Esther Muir) is wallpapered to the wall

Death Becomes Her (1992)

Glamorous musical star Madeline Ashton's (Meryl Streep) incredulous response to Lisle Von Rhuman's (Isabella Rosselini): "But first, a warning..." after Madeline has already drunk the potion: "NOW a warning?!"; the jaw-dropping, award-winning visual effects used to comic effect, including the "backwards walk" when Madeline's head is rotated 180 (and later 360) degrees, and her shocked cry: "My ass! I can see my ass!"; the blasting of a shotgun into arch rival Helen Sharp's (Goldie Hawn) abdomen (a beaming Madeline: "These are the things that make life worth living!"), then Helen crawling out of the pool, ignorant of the large non-fatal hole in her stomach, growling: "Look at me, Ernest! Just look at me! I'm soaking wet!"; the bitch fight with shovels between Helen and Madeline (with her chortle: "You're a walking lie Helen, and I can see right through you!" while peeking through the hole); and the ending when undead Madeline and Helen shatter after falling down the steps, with a disembodied hand annoyedly drumming its fingers, and Helen muttering: "Do you remember where you parked the car?"

Defending Your Life (1991)

Yuppie Daniel Miller's (Albert Brooks) office birthday speech ("This is a great present, and I wish I could squeeze you all into one pretty woman. And if you'd like to go to my office, I'll try"); also his screaming death as he crashes his new Mercedes into a charter bus; and his retort when asked by an unfunny comedian (Roger Behr): "How did you die?" - "On stage, like you!"; the scene in post-death way-station Judgment City in which holographic Shirley MacLaine (Herself) hosts The Past Lives Pavilion (with an off-screen woman exclaiming, "Oh my God!") -- and Daniel - looking in a mirror - finds out that he was once a tribal native who became "dinner" for a lion

Diner (1982)

Most of the scenes at the 1959 Fells Point diner between a group of six high-school graduate friends; the scene of a pre-nuptial 140 question trivia test (65 is passing) about the Baltimore Colts pro football team required by virginal momma's boy Eddie (Steve Guttenberg) for his off-screen fiancee Elyse just before the wedding - friends and family members gather around the basement to keep score where he grills her; and the scene of the debate on the merits of playing either Johnny Mathis or Frank Sinatra while making out; also the scene of Fenwick's (Kevin Bacon) drunk destruction of the city's Nativity scene, and hustling, indebted Boogie's (Mickey Rourke) macho movie-theatre wager with his friends that he can entice a girl on a first date to a certain level of intimacy - executed with the creative use of a popcorn box with blonde date Carol Heathrow (Colette Blonigan) in a movie theatre; and Shrevie's (Daniel Stern) obsessed insistence that his 45 rpm records be filed alphabetically according to year and genre category; also the argument scene in the diner over Eddie's roast-beef sandwich

Dinner at Eight (1933)

The famous closing scene when vulgar Kitty (Jean Harlow) makes conversation with aging actress Carlotta (Marie Dressler) on their way into dinner: Kitty: "I was reading a book the other day." Carlotta (staggering at the thought): "Reading a book!" Kitty: "Yes. It's all about civilization or something, a nutty kind of a book. Do you know that the guy said that machinery is going to take the place of every profession?" Carlotta (eyeing Kitty's costume and shapely physical charms): "Oh, my dear, that's something you need never worry about"

Dirty Rotten Scoundrels (1988)

As two con-man battling for $50,000 (or sex) from sweet American soap opera actress and heiress Janet Colgate (Glenne Headley) on the French Rivera against suave pseudo-aristocrat Briton Lawrence Jamieson (Michael Caine), the loud and obnoxious American Freddy Benson (Steve Martin) is relegated, after drawing the short straw, to the role of impersonating Caine's younger idiot and spastic brother - "monkey boy" Prince Ruprecht, a la Jerry Lewis, to scare off marriage-minded heiresses (he eats with a cork on the end of his fork to prevent him from hurting himself; he also asks: "Excuse me, may I go to the bathroom first?" and appears to pee under the table into his pants); in another scene, he lubricates a yellow latex glove on his left hand after being asked the question: "What did we do when Uncle Ted was here?" and then hugs too tightly one of the prospects until Lawrence threatens: "Ruprecht, do you want the genital cuff?"

Divorce, American Style (1967)

The clever opening scene (a surreal montage) in which a god-like lawyer with an attache case walks to a hillside in Los Angeles, clothes himself in his judicial robe, and starts conducting the cacophony of vituperative arguments among bitterly-married couples in the upper-middle-class suburbanite houses below; and the classic scene in which the angry married couple Richard and Barbara Harmon (Dick Van Dyke and Debbie Reynolds) after a shouting match go into their bedroom and proceed through their synchronized nightly routine including opening and closing closet doors - without saying a word; and the scene in which the extended families and parents of divorce in six carloads try to sort out the various two dozen children - with commentary: ("That's Susie. She's Fred's second daughter by his first marriage. And that's her stepfather, Ed, whose Rosie was Jim's first wife. She had two kids by her first marriage, and...") - and one little girl overlooked and left behind by the scene's end


Greatest Funniest Movie Moments and Scenes
(alphabetical order, by film title)
Introduction | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10
Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 | Part 17 | Part 18 | Part 19 | Part 20

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