Greatest Funniest Movie

Moments and Scenes

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Title Screen
Movie Title/Year and Scene Descriptions
Screenshots

E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial (1982)

  • Gertie (Drew Barrymore) and E.T.'s screaming reactions to each other on first meeting
 

Easy Rider (1969)

  • the priceless image of drunken, ACLU civil rights lawyer George Hanson (Jack Nicholson) taking a drink - accompanied by his elbow flapping on his side like a chicken when toasting: "Here's to the first of the day, fellas. To old D.H. Lawrence. Nik-nik-nik-f-f-f-Indians!"
  • Captain America's (Peter Fonda) question: "You got a helmet?" - and George's response: "Oh, oh, I've got a helmet. I got a beauty!" - next, George was grinning and wearing a football helmet as he rode on the back of Captain America's high-handled motorcycle (to the tune of "If You Want to Be A Bird")
  • the scene of George's first sampling of marijuana and getting high - and his lengthy 'stoned' theories at the campfire about UFO's, alien Venutians on Earth and freedom: "That was a UFO, beamin' back at ya. Me and Eric Heisman was down in Mexico two weeks ago - we seen forty of 'em flying in formation. They-they-they've got bases all over the world now, you know. They've been coming here ever since 1946 - when the scientists first started bouncin' radar beams off of the moon. And they have been livin' and workin' among us in vast quantities ever since. The government knows all about 'em...Well, they are people, just like us - from within our own solar system. Except that their society is more highly evolved. I mean, they don't have no wars, they got no monetary system, they don't have any leaders, because, I mean, each man is a leader. I mean, each man - because of their technology, they are able to feed, clothe, house, and transport themselves equally - and with no effort...Why don't they reveal themselves to us is because if they did, it would cause a general panic. Now, I mean, we still have leaders upon whom we rely for the release of this information. These leaders have decided to repress this information because of the tremendous shock that it would cause to our antiquated systems. Now, the result of this has been that the Venutians have contacted people in all walks of life - all walks of life. [laughs] Yes. It-it-it would be a devastatin' blow to our antiquated systems - so now the Venutians are meeting with people in all walks of life - in an advisory capacity. For once, man will have a god-like control over his own destiny. He will have a chance to transcend and to evolve with some equality for all."


Erin Brockovich (2000)

  • the scene in the PG & E office when newly-hired single mother Erin Brockovich (Julia Roberts) as a file clerk admitted to the counter attendant Mr. Scott (Jamie Harrold) that she was on a search for records: "Believe it or not, I'm on the prowl for some water records" - and used her push-up bra and cleavage to flirtatiously access the files in the back room, when she suggested: "You know, it would probably be easiest if I just squeezed back there and poked around myself" - she was shocked to find evidence of a "Cleanup and Abatement Order" that mentioned "hexavalent chromium" and "contamination" in "polluted groundwater" in the city of Hinkley's water supply
  • and the later scene when her boss, lawyer Ed Masry (Albert Finney) asked how she was able to obtain copies of classified documents, she told him bluntly: "They're called boobs, Ed"
  • Ed Masry's exclamation after a young, hot-shot PG & E lawyer (Michael Shamberg) offensively offered only $250,000, and then stated the entire worth of PG & E at $28 billion: "I didn't know it was that much! Wow! Twenty-eight billion! Holy cow!"
  • and during another negotiating conference with PG & E, Erin's angry outburst at the lawyers: "Now that pisses me off. First of all, since the demurrer, we have more than 400 plaintiffs. And let's be honest, we all know there are more out there. They may not be the most sophisticated people, but they do know how to divide and $20,000,000 dollars isn't s--t when you split it between them. Second of all, these people don't dream about being rich. They dream about being able to watch their kids swim in a pool without worrying that they'll have to have a hysterectomy at the age of 20. Like Rosa Diaz, our client. Or have their spine deteriorate, like Stan Bloom, another client of ours. So before you come back here with another lame-ass offer, l want you to think real hard about what your spine is worth, Mr. Walker. Or what you might expect someone to pay you for your uterus, Ms. Sanchez. Then take out your calculator and you multiply that number by 100. Anything less than that is a waste of our time" - and then when the representative grabbed for a glass of water, Erin added: "By the way, we had that water brought in special for you folks. It came from a well in Hinkley"
  • the scene of Erin putting down the haughty tone of researcher Theresa (Veanne Cox), who "got off on the wrong foot" - after Erin gave an impressive run-down of the ailments of some of the 600 Hinkley clients: "That's all you got, lady. Two wrong feet in f--king ugly shoes!"
  • and the scene of Erin matter-of-factly explaining how she was able to obtain key evidence ("internal PG & E documents all about the contamination") and the signatures of 634 clients from Hinkley: "Seeing as how I have no brains or legal expertise and Ed here was losing all faith in the system...I just went out there and performed sexual favors. 634 blowjobs in five days. I'm really quite tired"









Everything You Wanted to Know About Sex (But Were Afraid To Ask) (1972)

The seven witty comedy segments or episodes based on Dr. Reuben's notorious, best-selling sex manual:

  • the "Do Aphrodisiacs Work?" episode, with Woody Allen as a court jester Fool seducing a Queen (Lynn Redgrave) with a love potion - he made a smug aside to the camera after tricking two guards: "You like the way I fooled these guys?" but was foiled and obstructed by her chastity belt: ("I shall with great dispatch open the latch to get to her snatch"), and his feeble excuse when caught hiding in the Queen's dress: ("You know how you always said if I was in town I should look up your wife?")
  • the love-making sketch: "What is Sodomy?", with Dr. Doug Ross (Gene Wilder) interested in a sheep named Daisy
  • the segment: "Why Do Some Women Have Trouble Reaching an Orgasm?" - a Casanova '70 (1965) spoof in which an upper-class Italian newlywed Gina (Louise Lasser) could only orgasm with her husband Fabrizio (Woody Allen) in public places
  • the horror/monster movie spoof, the sixth segment ("Are the Findings of Doctors and Clinics Who Do Sexual Research and Experiments Accurate?") in which a mad, unorthodox sex scientist Dr. Bernardo (John Carradine) let loose a giant killer runaway breast that had to be captured by an enormous bra: ("Be on the lookout for a large female breast...about a 4,000 with an X-cup"), and the relief at Victor Shakapopulis' (Woody Allen) rescue after corraling the breast: ("Victor, I'm so proud of you. You did it. Oh, oh, I was so worried. Were you scared?...I thought you were gonna get nursed to death"), although the Woods County Sheriff (Dort Clark) was still concerned: ("Only one thing bothers me, though. That's a single. You're sure that was a single, now?...Yeah, well, they usually travel in pairs...well, I've never seen one by itself. I mean, two, yes, but not just one. So what we're gonna do. We're gonna take a nipple print, just so we'll have identification on this one")
  • the last and final vignette ("What Happens During Ejaculation?") set in the human body (in a gigantic futuristic control center - the brain) during a man's romantic involvement leading to sexual intercourse - with the out-of-place black sperm's confused wondering: "What am I doing here? What am I doing here?!"; a white-clad, neurotic Sperm # 1 (Woody Allen) with metaphysical doubts and fears - and in a panic with fears that he was to be ejaculated or launched - actually parachuted - into enemy territory from Sidney's body during a hot petting session with a date in a parked car: ("I'm not going out there! I'm not going to get shot out of that thing! What if he's masturbating?"); the last line uttered by The Operator (Tony Randall) in the brain control-room was a warning about a new attempt: "We're going for seconds! Attention, gonads, we're going for a record!"






Evil Dead 2: Dead By Dawn (1987)

  • the gruesomely hysterical fight between Ash Williams (Bruce Campbell) and his own possessed attacking hand that broke plates over his head and then dragged him across the room towards a knife with which to kill him; in a schizophrenic fever, Ash pinned his hand to the floor with another knife and laughed spitefully: "Who's laughing now? Who's laughing now?" as he sawed off the demon, evil hand (before it infected his entire body) with a chainsaw (notice that the top-most book Ash placed on the bucket when covering up his decapitated hand was A Farewell to Arms)
  • the lobbed-off hand began flopping around and re-attacked, and even flipped him the 'middle finger,' so he blasted it with a shotgun and thought he had killed it for good: "Got ya, didn't I, ya little sucker!" - yet it sprayed him with a torrent of blood; many of the objects in the living room then began laughing at him - the mounted deer head, the books in the bookcase, the lamps, etc. and he hysterically joined in




F

Fargo (1996)

  • the crime scene at which 7 months-pregnant Brainerd's Chief of Police Marge Gunderson (Frances McDormand) doubled over, bent down, and supported herself on her knee as her morning sickness overwhelmed her instead of the tragedy of the roadside triple murder - as she stated: "I just think I'm gonna barf"
  • Marge's questioning of smarmy and snippy car salesman Jerry Lundegaard (William H. Macy) in his autosales office: ("Ma'am, I answered your question. I answered the darn... I'm cooperating here, and there's, there's no, uhm...Well, heck! If you wanna, if you wanna play games here. I'm workin' with ya on this thing here, but, OK, I'll do a damn lot count...Yah, right now. You're darned tootin'. If it's so damned important to ya") - but then fled from the showroom, and her shocked realization: "Oh, for Pete's sake, he's fleeing the interview! He's fleeing the interview!" when she saw suspect Jerry escaping in a car outside the auto dealership
  • the offbeat scene of Marge's interrogation of two dim-witted hookers (Larissa Kokernot and Melissa Peterman) at the Lakeside Club to learn what the suspects looked like, with one of them describing a "funny looking" uncircumcised male: ("The little guy was kinda funny-Iookin'...I don't know. Just funny-Iookin'...I couldn't really say. He wasn't circumcised")



Fast Times at Ridgemont High (1982)

  • the scene of 'worldly', sexually-outspoken high-school sexpot Linda Barrett (Phoebe Cates) 'tutoring' sexually-inexperienced but curious friend Stacy Hamilton (Jennifer Jason Leigh) in the finer points of performing oral sex, by demonstrating with a carrot in the school cafeteria ("There's nothing to it, it's so easy")
  • the classroom scenes involving perpetually-stoned, often truant and tardy, bleached-blonde California surfer dude Jeff Spicoli (Sean Penn) and American history teacher Mr. Hand (Ray Walston) - and the ordering of a pizza delivered to Jeff's desk during a class lecture, causing outrage: ("Am I hallucinating here? Just what in the hell do you think you're doing?" - Spicoli's laid-back response: "Learning about Cuba, and having some food")
  • the fantasy sequence of Jeff's surfing interview with sportscaster Stu Nahan - and his fantasy dream of glory and fame as a championship-winning, world-class surfer - while surrounded by two bikinied babes, and his line: ("Well Stu, I'll tell ya, surfing's not a sport, it's a way of life. No hobby. It's a way of lookin' at that wave and sayin', 'Hey bud, let's party! Ha, ha, ha'")
  • the scene of Mr. Hand surprising malingering Spicoli by calling on him at home while he was lying in bed and getting high (with his room decorated with Playboy centerfolds) - to discuss "in great detail the Davis Agreement, all the associated treaties, and the American Revolution in particular" so that he was delayed in attending his senior prom


Father of the Bride (1950)

  • a satirical film about the difficult preparations and rites of matrimony with its opening scene of well-to-do lawyer Stanley T. Banks (Spencer Tracy), collapsed in a chair, looking back on the wedding he had just lived through for his beautiful daughter Kay (Elizabeth Taylor) -- with his exasperated reactions to exorbitant costs and how everyone else was spending his money, and the overbearing caterers: ("An experienced caterer can make you ashamed of your house in fifteen minutes")
  • also the segment of his nightmarish vision of what might happen at the wedding (he imagined himself appearing late, in tatters, and not able to walk down the springy and rubbery aisle, as his daughter screamed)


Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)

  • the opening scene of malingering rich-kid, trouble-making student Ferris Bueller (Matthew Broderick) describing (with graphics) how to fool parents and skip a day of school ("The key to faking out the parents is the clammy hands. It's a good non-specific symptom. I'm a big believer in it. A lot of people will tell you that a good phony fever is a dead lock, but, uh, you get a nervous mother, you could wind up in a doctor's office. That's worse than school. You fake a stomach cramp, and when you're bent over, moaning and wailing, you lick your palms. It's a little childish and stupid, but then, so is high school. Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in awhile, you could miss it.")
  • the scene of Economics teacher (Ben Stein) calling attendance roll repeatedly: ("Bueller? Bueller? Bueller?"), and after a view of Ferris' empty chair, fellow student Simone (Kristy Swanson) gave a confused excuse about how Ferris was sick: ("He's sick. My best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who's going with the girl who saw Ferris pass out at 31 Flavours last night. I guess it's pretty serious")
  • the scene in Dean of Students Ed Rooney's (Jeffrey Jones) office, who explained how dangerous Ferris was: ("I don't trust this kid any further than I can throw him...What is so dangerous about a character like Ferris Bueller is he gives good kids bad ideas...The last thing I need at this point in my career is 1500 Ferris Bueller disciples running around these halls. He jeopardizes my ability to effectively govern this student body") - and then his secretary Grace (Edie McClurg) explained how popular Ferris was: ("He makes you look like an ass is what he does, Ed...Oh, well, he's very popular, Ed. The sportos, the motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, wasteoids, dweebies, dickheads - they all adore him. They think he's a righteous dude")
  • the scene of Dean of Students Ed Rooney receiving what he believed was a crank phone call from Ferris but it was actually from Ferris' girlfriend's 'father' (actually Ferris' friend Cameron Frye (Alan Ruck)) asking for her to be excused - and his sarcastic and insulting tone: ("Tell you what, dipshit, you don't like my policies you can just come on down and smooch my big ol' white butt!...Pucker up, buttercup!") until another phone call was received and announced by Grace: ("Ferris Bueller's on line two...")
  • the scene of Rooney trying to catch Ferris at home and being confronted by the slobbering family Rotweiler - and then Ferris' sister Jeanie (Jennifer Grey) who was also skipping class and had returned home; when she came face-to-face with him in the kitchen, thinking he was a prowler, she karate-kicked him in the face three times - his eyes blanked before he fell backwards unconscious
  • the curtain-closing post-credits appearance of Ferris from the bathroom telling the audience (fourth wall) to leave: "You're still here? It's over! Go home. Go!"







A Fish Called Wanda (1988)

  • lunatic, shady weapons partner, and ex-CIA hitman Otto West's (Kevin Kline) repeated snarl: "Don't call me stupid!" -- and Wanda Gershwitz's (Jamie Lee Curtis) description of Otto's stupidity and continuing lack of intelligence: ("Aristotle was not Belgian. The central message of Buddhism is not 'every man for himself', and the London Underground is not a political movement. Those are all mistakes, Otto. I looked 'em up")
  • Otto's dangling of conservative and stuffy British barrister Archie Leach (John Cleese) outside the window to force an apology
  • the many attempts of stammering, animal-loving hitman Ken Pile (Michael Palin) to assassinate an old lady (Patricia Hayes) (a matronly eye-witness threat), cruelly killing her three cherished pet dogs instead (mauling by an attack dog, run-over by a taxi, and crushing by a falling safe)
  • the fact of wily and seductive femme fatale and sexy jewel thief Wanda's complete sexual arousal when she heard foreign languages
  • Archie's painful admission of British stoicism to Wanda: ("Wanda, do you have any idea what it's like being English? Being so correct all the time, being so stifled by this dread of, of doing the wrong thing, of saying to someone 'Are you married?' and hearing ' My wife left me this morning,' or saying, uh, ' Do you have children?' and being told they all burned to death on Wednesday. You see, Wanda, we'll all terrified of embarrassment. That's why we're so... dead. Most of my friends are dead, you know, we have these piles of corpses to dinner")
  • the scene of lustful Archie caught in the buff by a British family in what he thought was a perfect hideaway for an adulterous tryst with Wanda, forcing him to use a strategically-placed framed photo to modestly hide himself
  • Otto's torture of Ken by eating his pet fish in front of him
  • Otto's taunting of Ken ("It's K-k-k-ken c-c-coming to k-k-k-kill me!") just before Ken ran over him with a steamroller

 






Five Easy Pieces (1970)

  • the celebrated roadside cafe-diner scene of an impatient Bobby Dupea's (Jack Nicholson) frustrating fight with a strict, recalcitrant, rude, by-the-rules and surly waitress (Lorna Thayer) (who allowed 'no substitutions') over his initial side order of wheat toast - that quickly became a chicken-salad sandwich order with toasted wheat bread but without the chicken, lettuce and mayo: ("You make sandwiches, don't you?") in order to bypass the diner's rules about menu substitutions - including his challenge to "Hold the chicken" between her knees and his clearing of the table after telling her: ("You see this sign?")

Forbidden Planet (1956)

  • the unintentionally hysterical line when a ship's crew-member stupidly asked friendly Robby the Robot (voice by Marvin Miller): "Er, no offense, but you are a robot, aren't you?"
  • Robby's functioning as both a house servant and guard, and providing comic relief: ("Sorry miss, I was giving myself an oil job!")

Forrest Gump (1994)

  • the computerized special-effects and imaging that put intellectually-challenged Forrest Gump (Tom Hanks) into comedic situations with historical events (i.e., Gov. Wallace's stand-off in Little Rock, and his assassination attempt) and with Presidents and other celebrities (JFK - with his hilarious plea: "I gotta pee", LBJ, Nixon, Elvis Presley, John Lennon)

The 40 Year-Old Virgin (2005)

  • the character of nerdy, middle-aged, virginal electronics Smart-Tech super-store worker Andy Stitzer (rising star Steve Carell), with hobbies (such as hand-painted models, vintage action figures (Atomic Man and Aquaman) and comic books collecting and watching "Survivor" with his elderly neighbors, or making the perfect egg-salad sandwich), whose sex-obsessed store salesmen buddies kept offering him sex advice: ("You know what's a fun game?...Take three Excedrin PMs and you see if you can whack off before you fall asleep. You always win - the best part about the game") and decided that it was time for him to score - they advised him to act tough ("like David Caruso in Jade") - ("That boy needs to get laid").
  • the scenes of Andy finding himself found himself assailed by sex coming at him from all directions: from men's magazines (featuring naked women on covers) at a newspaper/magazine kiosk, from a bus banner for ERUPTION ("You know you want it..."), and from two dogs he observed humping each other in the park
  • during a flashback to his awkward teen years, Andy's memory of how he struggled to remove the bra from his big-breasted date (Laura Bottrell, as College Girl), as she screamed at him: "You're pulling my f--king hair out!" Then she exclaimed as she stood topless: "God! Oh my God, you came in your pants. What did you do?" Andy: "I had some Cream of wheat"
  • another date with red bra-wearing Toe Sucking Girl (Carla Gallo), when Andy accidentally kicked her in the face causing a bloody nose when she tried to suck on his toes. She screamed at him: "You are terrible at this. You should give up forever. (Unrated: "I'm hot! But now you can't have any of this.")
  • during a speed-dating lunch hour session called Date-A-Palooza, his prospective busty date Carol (Kimberly Page) inadvertently flashed him at the table
  • funny gags included Andy's first experience on using a condom - even under the covers, his drive home with drunken date DUI Nicky (Leslie Mann, director Judd Apatow's wife), his date with nymphomaniacal, coquettish, crazed sexaholic bookstore clerk Beth (Elizabeth Banks) who demonstrated her masturbatory skill with a detachable vibrating shower head in the bathtub ("I'd like to introduce you to my friend")
  • his final success with free-spirited 40 year-old divorced mother of three Trish (Catherine Keener) who abided by a no-sex policy for 20 dates
  • Andy's botched chest-waxing treatment
  • the scene of verbal battle during a game of Mortal Kombat between his sex-obsessed buddies David and Cal (Paul Rudd and Seth Rogan) about how one knew the other one was homosexual: ("You know how I know that you're gay?...You like the movie Maid in Manhattan...I saw you make a spinach dip in a loaf of sourdough bread once....You have a red and gold bumper sticker on your car that says 'I love it when balls are in my face'...Because you macramed yourself a pair of jean shorts...")






Four Weddings and a Funeral (1994, UK)

  • the opening scene, with a barrage of many F-words, of upper-class, commitment phobic bachelor Charles (Hugh Grant) and Scarlett (Charlotte Coleman) waking up and realizing that they were late to a wedding
  • the scene of Charles seated at a wedding table with many of his ex-girlfriends - squirming and cringing while listening to their recollections
  • the first kisses between Charles and American girl Carrie (Andie MacDowell) in her room, when she showed him different kinds of kisses (from pecks to open-mouthed) - after explaining: ("So I noticed the bride and groom didn't kiss in the church which is kind of strange. Where I come from, kissing is very big...I always worry I'll go too far, you know, in the heat of the moment") - and then after a very passionate kiss, he remarked to her: ("That might be taking it a little far")
  • the scene, after Charles and Carrie slept together (a one night stand), when she asked: ("When were you thinking of announcing the engagement?...I assumed since we slept together and everything, we'd be getting married") - but then admitted her joke - and his expression of relief: ("God! For a moment there, I thought I was in Fatal Attraction. I thought you were Glenn Close and I was gonna get home and find my pet rabbit on the stove")
  • the scene of an inept, inexperienced, confused, verbally-fumbling, malaprop-spouting vicar Father Gerald (Rowan Atkinson) reciting the vows for the "awful-wedded" marital couple in the second of the film's four weddings - "In the name of the father, the son, and the holy spigot"
  • the scene of the charming Carrie discussing her prolific sexual history with Charles, who hilariously recounted her experiences with 33 sexual partners - he was designated as # 32 (one before her fiancee), after which she summarized her recounting: ("...So there you go, less than Madonna, more than Princess Di - I hope")
  • the stuttering, nervous and hesitant 'romantic' declaration of Charles' love for Carrie after she had bought herself a wedding dress: ("Uhm, look. Sorry, sorry. Uh, I just, uhm, well, this is a really stupid question and, uhm, particularly in view of our recent shopping excursion, but, uh, I just wondered, if by any chance, uhm, ah, I mean obviously not because I am just some git who's only slept with nine people, but-but I-I just wondered...uhh. I really feel, umm...in short, to recap in a slightly clearer version, uh, in the words of David Cassidy in fact, uhm, while he was still with the Partridge Family, uh, 'I think I love you,' and uh, I-I, uh, just wondered by any chance, you wouldn't like to... Umm...Uh...Uh...No, no, no, of course not...Uhm, I'm an idiot, ha, he's not... Excellent, excellent, fantastic...lovely to see you, sorry to disturb...Better get on...Well, I thought it over a lot, you know, I wanted to get it just right. Important to have said it, I think...Said, uh, you know, what I, what I just said about, uh, David Cassidy") - she kissed him: ("You're lovely")
  • and the final image (in the ending slide-show) of acerbic Fiona (Kristin Scott Thomas) with a very surprising groom - Prince Charles!





The Full Monty (1997, UK)

  • the famous short dole queue scene - a Chippendales-style, feel-good moment in which unemployed working-class men from the Sheffield mill factory heard Donna Summer's Hot Stuff on the radio and rhythmically started moving - first slowly shifting in place and then dancing irresistably in unison - ultimately devising a get-rich-quick scheme for Gary "Gaz" Schofield (Robert Carlyle) (who needed money for child support for his son Nathan) and the entire group to make money
  • the stripper audition scene when anatomically well-endowed but uncoordinated candidate Guy (Hugo Speer) dropped his pants and Gaz observed: "Gentleman, the lunch box has landed"
  • their practice rehearsals when the clutzy would-be dancers worked on their bump and grind act
  • in the finale, the actual amusing stripping scene on-stage of the stripper group - dubbed "Hard Steel" - during a rendition of Tom Jones' You Can Leave Your Hat On, when they went "the full monty" ("with their widges hanging out") by pulling off their red g-string thongs (with hat cover-up) to the delight of many screaming female fans - ending in a freeze-frame


Funny Girl (1968)

  • Fanny Brice (Barbra Streisand) singing "Beautiful Bride" as a bride with an unexpected fake pregnant belly to subvert the romantic lyrics into comedy (and Florenz Ziegfeld's (Walter Pigeon) stunned reaction offstage)

Greatest Funniest Movie Moments and Scenes
(alphabetical order, by film title)
Intro | A1 | A2 | B1 | B2 | C | D | E-F | G | H-I | J-K-L
M1 | M2 | N-O | P1 | P2 | Q-R | S1 | S2 | T | U-V-W-X-Y-Z

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